#Inhale Exhale

#NewPiece #InhaleExhale #Sad 
Inhale, exhale slowly, deeply and passionately 
My body lays awake, touching the floor painfully 
Memories reaches my throats suffocating my will to fight back,
I have done a sin father, I have a done sin mother
I have reopened some wounds last night, more than some
Let my sensitive skin get scratched engraved,
till blood was covering the backseat
 there were no escape!
This morning 4 am sharp I dug up into stories
that was made up, till I couldn't stop, till I hit the max, till this was no joke till I was hurt, numb and sinned. Again
Yes, for a few seconds, days and years I felt comfortable
I loved every second of it, every single detail bruise on my skin,
Yes, I didn't want to heal, I didn't want to lay on the bath and lush out till healing make me feel something powerful, I wanted to be weak, anxious and in a mess.
 Inhale, exhale slowly, deeply and passionately,
I lay down in the backseat, where you can see my skin pouring out of love, signing in throughout my virtual tool, checking my Instagram account, where only perfection is allowed there,
I move slowly my head reaching to the stars, looking at my fingers wanted to dial 911, but I couldn't feel them, I could only feel tears washing away my agony turning the pain in my chest to dance like the devils dances, screen turned off, the display shows my face now, I look like an empty plate now, trying to smile in order to scare away my fears of dying slowly, reaching to my phone again, trying to post something about my feelings, till phrases and metaphors lighten up " Attention Seeker" ' No
one care" till without noticing I threw away the only help I had.
Inhale, exhale slowly, deeply and passionately,
I sat in the backseat, I swear I felt like something was getting out of my body, till I started to shiver, I am hearing lights now
But its colourful, darker colours, I am seeing the sounds of people voiceless pale faces, damn they look wonderful from where I am sighting they are applauding, I have done it
I am the scars on my body, laying on a white clean bed,
Some electronics power reaches my chest 1. 2. 3
A small squared screen, 1, 2, 3 Again! Again
I made myself into an art piece, sell me for the meaningless now
1, 2, 3, Again! Beep was the last thing I have heard before I could see myself in the dark, before I turned into ashes
Before my emotional healing process turned into nothing.
I have worked hard on me, to turn myself into something powerful, weak, beautiful and agonized
I have turned myself into a beauty of words
I have turned myself into healing
Beep! Inhale, exhale slowly, deeply and passionately,
I am clean, pure and innocent
the scream in my throat is gone now, I am the healing
I am the healing,
Inhale, exhale slowly, deeply and passionately,