How much do I have to eat?

How much do I have to eat?
Before the pain goes away?
Will I have to break Into more pieces?
Perhaps you would see,
How many tears do I have to cry?
Before you see my name,
On the small screen
And I am trying to love you,
But why won’t you let me?
Is it something I have said?
Maybe or pretend,
And! What truly hurts?
How you think, this is easy,
Easy watching you loving
Someone else,
How wonderful my heart cracks,
Without any noise!
It feels the bitter, and the intense,
And I wanted to fight for us,
With all my heart,
But I realized,
When it was too little late
I was fighting alone.
As I taste the unrequited love,
Of loneliness, mad and shivery
And after all, we have been through,
You said “I don’t care"
As I still lay awake,
In my bedroom, staring
At the story that has ended
Rewriting all the memories
And erasing the good ones,
Perhaps I would forget,
But till then, I hold my pen
Listen to your song
And just sit and pretend